Our Storm

I'm trapped in the middle of a storm... a full blown wind, rain, and thunder kinda of storm.

A few weeks ago at my Momma's annual doctor's appointment Dr. Harris recommended she have an ultrasound. It was just as a precaution to what he said might be some uterine fibroids. I remember her calling me concerned and I confidently replied, "Oh momma it's fine! He just wants to check it out." Little did I know that we were at the beginning of a long, hard road.

Momma waited and prayed.

Then, Friday morning before Memorial Day weekend Momma called me again, this time to report that the ultrasound tech found a grapefruit size cyst on her ovary. One that, according to the ultrasound tech, was mostly fluid filled but had some solid borders--which sometime means cancer. Let me tell you those words sunk in. No longer was I laid back or low key about the news now my heart was stirred and my soul was weary. After some phone calls to the doctor's office we found out that she would be having a CA125 test on that Saturday. This test is a good indicator of ovarian cancer, but the results wouldn't be available for a few days.

Momma waited and we all prayed.

That Monday morning we got the encouraging report that momma's "numbers" were low and that meant most likely there wasn't any cancer in the cyst but the doctor still wanted to remove it. He said once the cyst was out it could be tested further to tell more about whether or not it was cancerous since the blood test was not definitive. Since he was already operating he suggested that she go ahead and have a full hysterectomy. We agreed...no ovaries = no chance of future scary cysts. The doctor told mom that his office would call her with a surgery date within the next couple of days.

Momma waited and we all prayed.

As the next week unfolded Momma started to have some pain in her back and sides. The Enemy was working in full force taunting her with the idea that cancer was eating away at her healthy body. The doctor's office called and reported that her surgery was scheduled for Monday, June 8th, which was still a week away.

So, momma waited and we all continued to pray.

That brings us to yesterday morning. We arrived at the hospital at 11 am and waited for an hour in the waiting room before they ever called Momma back to prep her for surgery. Once she was back in pre-op she waited another FOUR hours before they took her to surgery. The procedure was supposed to last 1 to 2 hours, after 3 hours of waiting Dr. Harris came out and gave us the news. (Do you see the recurring theme here....we have been doing lots of waiting.) The cyst showed "borderline cancer" on the rapid pathology testing. WHAT? Again my heart sunk. Why God?? The doctor continued by saying, "We took everything out, even some lymph nodes, and did some biopsies that we will send for further testing. Not perfect news but a good surgery." I didn't know how to feel-- "borderline caner"?! Instant fear came over me and then I realized... the God I serve is bigger than cancer, or any sickness for that matter. HE is in control. The final test results will come on Thursday so here we go again....

Momma is waiting and we are all praying with faithful hearts.

On Thursday we will know whether this is no cancer, borderline cancer, stage 1 cancer, etc. but no matter what we have the opportunity to exercise and grow our faith that God will see us through this storm. The good news is that everything has already been surgically removed which is what the prescribed treatment would be if it indeed is the dreaded C word, so we are ahead of the game if the tests show that. Either way this was detected, diagnosed, and defeated early on--- praise the Lord!! Momma is in good spirits and continues to amaze me with her unwavering faith and trust. I am so blessed by her godly example! I'll wrap up this long post now but first I wanted to share the lyrics to this song with you, it has been on my mind alot for the last few weeks and I think it perfectly describes how I feel right now....

Thanks for reading, keep on praying!!

Praise You in This Storm

I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down and wiped our tears away, stepped in and saved the day. But once again, I say amen and it's still raining as the thunder rolls I barely hear You whisper through the rain, "I'm with you"and as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away.

And I'll praise you in this storm and I will lift my hands. For You are who You are, no matter where I am and every tear I've cried You hold in your hand. You never left my side and though my heart is torn I will praise You in this storm.

I remember when I stumbled in the wind You heard my cry to You and raised me up again. My strength is almost gone how can I carry on if I can't find You and as the thunder rolls I barely hear You whisper through the rain "I'm with you"and as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away.

And I'll praise you in this storm and I will lift my hands. For You are who You are, no matter where I am and every tear I've cried You hold in your hand. You never left my side and though my heart is torn I will praise You in this storm.

I lift my eyes onto the hills where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth. I lift my eyes onto the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.

And I'll praise you in this storm and I will lift my hands. For You are who You are, no matter where I am and every tear I've cried You hold in your hand. You never left my side and though my heart is torn I will praise You in this storm.